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batlock:

So.

Cards Against Humanity.

I’m a big fan. Well, I bought this.

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It’s great. It hold all of my shit. But it holds something else too.

If you have it, open your box.

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You see how I started to tear away at the top of the box there?

Do that.

Do it carefully.

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Holy shit.

There’s something in there. What could that be?

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There’s a card.

There is a card literally hidden in the top of the box.

But what card?

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I fucking love these people.

ven0moth:

excuse me orthodontist how am i supposed to give head like this????

thorxndor:

I was sitting on my friends bed with her when she came out as gay

and I was looking through a Chinese food pamphlet

so I put it down, looked at her and said “I was going to suggest ordering food but I see now you’d prefer to eat out”

and I don’t think she’s ever really forgave me  

lalalafrickyou:

bloody-nips:

i’m watching Extreme Couponing and i just saw a woman rack up a charge of over $1000 and then her coupon game was so fucking raw by the end of it the store owed her $8. what the fuck

“her coupon game was so fuckin raw” is basically the best string of words ever concocted

(Source: slimydad)

Pussy put his ass to sleep, now he callin’ me NyQuil

William Shakespeare (via whitegirlgrant)

nikki minaj is a gross fuck who is overly sexual and uses too many swear words I'd rather listen to something decent like mozart.
Anonymous

shitrichcollegekidssay:

vivalafro:

shitrichcollegekidssay:

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Mozart - “Leck mich im Arsch” - Canon in B flat for 6 Voices, K. 231 / K. 382c

ok.

mozart writes about getting that ass licked

nicki sings about getting that ass licked

both true musical masters, honestly

The way art is suppose to be